"Live Simply ~ Part 2"

This is only my take on living simple to each their own.  How I live is how I like living, so my lifestyle might seem odd to you but it makes me happy.  

"Simplicity is the peak of civilization" ~ Jessie Sampter  

Less can be more for me.  

The less clutter on my dresser, the better I feel about that piece of furniture. My mind is more at ease.  When I clean out my email the same feeling.  Decluttering basically gives me control over my future emotions, where a mess would give me anxiety.  Tidy up now and save myself the grief of spending hours later.  OCD maybe? No, this is how I function.  Without organization I would lose my mind.  But this isn't only about year round spring cleaning, but keeping my mind zen.  Balance. Without balance in my life I cannot function, so I create my own balance.  Simple mindset, simple lifestyle.  

I will be good to people.

This world can be ugly, we need more good in the world so I like to be a part of the good realm.  Having uplifting conversations with total strangers, giving to the needy and I'm not talking about dropping a bag of stuff off at the Goodwill. Give one of my two Egyptian cotton sheet sets to a woman who has no sheets to sleep on.  Give her my shirt if she likes it, I have more shirts at home. I believe in karma. 

I will be positive.

Even when the negative looms all around me.  I love my fiancée with all my heart, however he is filled with negative energy.  He radiates negativity to the point to where I have to get away from him.  My fiancée is an extreme pessimist.  He looks at the bad before envisioning what good could come out of the situation.  I think happy thoughts therefore I am.  He thinks I'm some "hippie, spiritualist nature lover", I'm ok with this label.  I'm nice even when he's mean, I kill with kindness which is fail safe.  

I will be slow to anger.

Anger is evil, it harvests demons that create more evil. I make the conscious choice to not be angry.  Yes, I DO and have gotten angry however it's a rare occasion and I'm only human. I can only control so much on my own, and the rest to the universe.  Nothing works right when I do it with anger, and I like things to work right.  I don't scream or yell at my children to correct them, it only makes the situation worse and teaches them dysfunctional communicative skills with others.  I teach patience by showing it, and it has paid off.  

I will sacrifice.

The happiness of my children is at the top of my priority list in life.  Being a mother has taught me everything I'm telling you here.  I will jump through hoops to see that my kids are happy.  I love to talk to them about everything life has to offer, long talks when they are sad.  I have raised good well-rounded children and they have the foundation they need to build a strong future, and that's my purpose as a mother.  Creating "good" people.  I sacrifice having a polished wardrobe, mani's and pedi's, haircuts, junk food, and all things glam so they can have whatever makes them happy.  Seeing a smile on their face is like Christmas morning, addicting.  The more they laugh the less they cry, make them laugh and be silly with my kids.  

I read the Bible.

I'm not going to preach, but this book teaches good therefore I read and apply the lessons to my daily life.  My golden rule is to treat others as you would have them treat you.  If I had two of the same thing, one being in worse shape than the other, I will give the best of the two.  If you're girlfriend has two pairs of jeans to loan you, would you honestly accept the jeans with that noticeable stain? If I was the one loaning the jeans, my friend gets the better pair.  It might not matter to her, however I'm happy inside when I know I've made that simple sacrifice.  Living simple involves a lot of sacrice for me.  

I will connect with nature everyday.  

Even if it's just a brief walk on my deck, I want the fresh air in my lungs and the sunshine on my face. Ultimately, I love gardening and digging in the dirt.  The earth has an energy field all it's own, and I tap into that daily.  Now am I sounding odd? Ha.  

I will stay busy.

My idle mind is a dangerous mind.  I don't need to lie around all day so that my mind wanders off course.  I have never been bored, even when I have nothing to do.  Having nothing to do is actually a great time to DO something, so I meditate. I envision positive things happening, I make goals and plans, I might teach myself something new.  I have several "projects" going so that I always have something to look forward too.  I'm up with the sun, and down with the moon. Meaning I only sleep when my body says too and that's not much and I'm ok with this.  I will never have a maid, or a nanny for my kids.  My house and my children are solely MY responsibility and no one else's.  

I will eat "clean".

You might not agree with my diet whatsoever.  I even think it's a bit odd, ha....but it works for me.  My diet is no diet at all, I only eat food to nourish my body. I don't eat food to diminish hunger.  I do stay away from meat, bread, and all junk.  Yes, ALL junk.  It feels gross to eat something I know isn't going to promote a healthier lifestyle, after all I do want to be here to see my children grow up.  I don't crave junk, because my body rejects it. I believe we are what we eat. 

I will be content with what I have.

This world is so materialistic these days, with big fancy possessions being some peoples "goals". If I had a million dollars, I would have a million dollar home.  I do not have a million dollars though, therefore I do to live in a million dollar home, and that's ok because I'm happy with my home.  It's big enough to meet our family's needs yet small enough to afford and keep clean.  I am not ashamed of my home that I toil so hard over every day of my life.  I will not idolize my possessions, and like any woman I have things like jewelry, perfume, highheels, dress clothes, nice cars (all paid for). So if I lost everything I have, I don't lose much.  This might tie into my childhood a bit, I've become accustomed to losing things, friends and loved ones which makes it hard for me to deeply connect with the outside world.  I don't like to become attached to things or people (except for my kids and fiancée).  I have had a lot of things in my life, as well as lost them.  Going without something always has made me appreciate it more.  I'm ok with not ever owning a pair of Louboutins, but yes sure they're beautiful.  I might not ever have a five carat diamond ring, I'm happy with the one I have.  I hope you see where I'm going with this.  I don't miss something I've never had.  

I will be honest.

Truly as cliche as this sounds, honesty IS the best policy for me. Lies beget lies, and can distinguish trust in my relationships.  I want those that love me and trust in me to know I will do as I say.  When I am faced with a question I don't like to answer, I tackle the response with candid honesty. For me it's easier to go ahead and deal with the circumstances at hand face-to-face rather than letting the problem fester.  Talk, communicate openly with my family and friends.  

I will sing everyday. 

Music has always been a big part of my life. I love to sing, it makes me happy inside.  Music can uplift me, it can be my friend when I have none.  

I will be happy.

This is MY choice and no one else's.  I can either choose to be in a bad mood or a good one. I will not let my environment control me or my emotions.  I have cried of course, like I've said I'm only human. 

Zen is my mantra, balance, peace, harmony. This how I "live simply". 

"Live Simply - Part 1"

"Live Simply" 

What does this mean to you?  To "live simply"? To me this means more than the tangible things in life. Simplify your mind and your life will follow a natural course.  I live day to day as simple as possible which I'm going to try to explain.  

My Background: in a nutshell sorta

Chaos, stress, unemployment, job loss, past due bills, hard times, sadness.  I choose to use these things to motivate me instead of letting them break me down.  Some wonder how I do it, I often times wonder how I do it too.  Maybe my childhood would clear things up if I put it on paper (or my ipad).  I didn't have a normal upbringing, at least to me it wasn't normal in any way.  

Born May 29, 1978  "Tina Marie Parr" I have no idea how much I weighed, or what I looked like as a newborn.  My mother, Peggy Parr never prepared a baby book for me.  I do have pics of when I was 1 yr. old and on however.  My mother died on March 29, 2010, I know this only because I googled her name one day.  I wanted to find her, I hadn't seen her since I was 9 years old.  My dad and I left her one day, we packed up and left in a hurry for Granny Parr's house.  Had we not, I might not be here today and so the story begins.

My dad was a full-time long distance truck driver.  My mother, a licensed cosmetologist, singer, and entertainer and severe alcoholic, she couldn't hold a job down. She took a .32 caliber hand gun out and pointed it to my leg in a drunken stupor, threatening to shoot me if I didn't give her my lunch money ($2.25) for more beer.  I reluctantly gave it to her, I liked eating at school it was all I got to eat all day.  I couldn't understand why she wanted more beer when she was already drunk.  Sure enough she took off to wherever I don't know because she didn't come back until the next day.  Nothing new to me, daddy was gone and Tina had to take care of mama when she passed out in the living room smoking cigarettes and drinking, and singing all night. She had a voice of an angel, she would sing in bars with her mother playing the piano.  Mama was beautiful, could get (and did get) lots of men, always bar hopping and running around.  She would "buy" my love instead of spending time with me, showering me in gifts.  Every time she would buy me something, it made me sad and I didn't understand why.  

So, I'm 9 years old and my parents divorce, as my dad and I move in with Granny Parr.  My granny became my mother figure, and I'm thankful for that.  She was perfect in my eyes.  I visited mama about three times before daddy took her parental rights away.  She couldn't stay sober long enough for me to stay with her overnight.  I have only vague memories of her, and then I never saw her again.  I longed for her for so many years, wondering what ever happened to her.  I contacted "The Montel Show", back in 1998, when I was 19. I thought he could help me find her somehow.  However, the airmail letter from the producers pretty much said I didn't have enough info for them to find her with.  Sylvia Brown = hogwash.  I lost hope and gave up, but never stopped thinking about mama.  

My dad went on to marry again, and my life started with a mean step-mom, meaner younger step-sister, and an older step-brother I still don't talk to this very day.  Long story short, my dad and step-mother became raging alcoholics themselves and put us three kids through the worst hell imaginable.  As soon as all three of us were old enough to leave home, we did.  I got married at 18 just to get out.  Divorced by the time I was 32.  

Jo, she took my mama in when she saw her selling shabby items on a small blanket next to the side of the road.  My mom explained to her that her boyfriend had beat her and run her off again.  Jo put my mama in a trailer next to her house rent free in exchange for housekeeping.  Mama was blinded by macular degeneration, she had slight peripheral vision.  She had just been approved to have her vision corrected through her insurance and was getting her disability squared away when she died at 62.  Horrible stories I wish Jo would have never told me about my mama, and the things that had happened to her.  This bastard tried burying her alive, forced her naked body out in the dead of winter to die in a ditch and much much more. After returning home from visiting her gravesite and getting the few things she owned from Jo, I cried myself to sleep for a week.  I couldn't imagine all the things she had gone through with that monster.  

After leaving home, my dad and I didn't speak for years.  He forbid me to marry so young and throw my life away, so he never walked me down the aisle.  That's ok my granny did, she had my back.  He didn't care about his grand kids either when they came along, and that really hurt me. We eventually came to speaking terms somehow oneday.  I had to get to know my dad again. My step-mother was killed in an automobile accident back in 2011,my dad married for the fifth time to his first love/highschool sweetheart last year.  

Four years ago while going through my divorce I asked my dad for help, for a place to live.  He had always said he would be there for me.  Well, he wasn't. He said it wouldn't be feasible to live out there.  However, my half-brother Jason pops up out of nowhere after all these years and is back in daddy's life.  Jason is now in complete charge of my dads land and home, left to him in a will.  My dad has a new life with a new wife, a cushy monthly income and no worries in the world.  An old friend from highschool ended up helping me out with $5,000.00 loan to start my life fresh.  

Aka: tinasnewlife. Back to living simply in my next blog.  I wanted you to have a "quick" rundown of my childhood.